Monday, December 8, 2008

Feh the halls

OK, put the tree up. Got the wreathes. Decorated stuff. Feh.

My heart's not in it, and I don't know why. If I didn't have kids I'd skip the whole thing.

But I do, and they make it worthwhile. My sweet son put on his fuzzy reindeer antlers and helped me decorate the tree and sighed with happiness when it snowed. We will bake cookies this weekend and get out the frosting and the colored sugars and make a glorious mess all over the kitchen. My daughter sings carols in her baby voice and tells me that if we don't have money for presents that it's OK with her.

I suppose because the mood of the country is so bad, it's affecting everyone. Millions of jobs lost, children sliding into poverty and hunger, and a man loses his life because of a stampeding mob at Walmart. How can I focus on shopping for gifts when the world is such a mess?

My kids are safe in the snow globe I have built around them: a comfortable home, school, basketball practice, homework, friends. But that snow globe isn't the real world any more than Christmas makes everyone loving and giving. There are days I want to give all my money away and live in a cave, but who would that actually help?

Anyway. I think I'll write a check to my favorite Christmas charity and offer up my heart to the universe, and see what happens.

2 comments:

the Tao of Teri said...

absolutely, unabashedly dead-on. If you opt for the cave, please send address at earliest convenience. I'll send housewarming gift.

Allie said...

i understand this feeling this year. i actually didn't put up a tree. i can't remember a year when i didn't do that.

i just can't super get into it.


i am doing presents - but only ones i can make with my hands. no shopping.

some will hate it - some won't care ....the ones i care most about will totally get it.

if you wanna hide - marietta is a nice place to do it!